About dialogue, part 2

With continued thanks to the International Association for Public Participation, whose excellent material I'm sharing and expounding on.

In dialogue, we seek to find common ground, not to 'win.'. The problem about winning is that it means someone else has lost. In common ground, we share. And from that common ground we can build greater understanding and find yet more common ground.

In dialogue, we listen to understand, not to find flaws. When someone is understood, they are more open and willing to work with you. When you find flaws, the other often closes, becomes defensive, and cannot be open to you or your ideas.

I deeply wish American political parties would seek common ground and to listen to understand.

Peace, y'all


Molly

Dialog vs debate

Here's an excerpt from some excellent training I just attended

Dialogue: a technique based on the art of thinking together--listening and thinking beyond one's position. The primary purpose is to reveal meaning and create an opportunity for learning, shared meaning, and aligned actions.

This resonates with me so much my head hums. I realize this technique can be applied to other challenges than peacemaking-even to antithetical purposes. Yet these techniques call to me.
1. Assume others have pieces of the answer.

Duh! The notion that there's one right answer is scary-wrong. It nay work for debate, and for other situations with winners and losers. But not for the path to a better tomorrow, in which there are just winners.

More to follow.

Peace, y'all

Molly

Trying to make the world a better place

Here's what I'm up to.
Selling paper beads from Uganda--bead for life, check it out. Beadforlife.org. My good friend Kathy is having a party featuring my beads.

Tonight I serve dinner to a very close friend and an old friend of my husband's who is back in our life.

Friday I'm bringing dinner to the gay kids at out local center for the LBGTQ youth.

I have signed one petition today, to fight slavery. I signed and mailed an old-fashioned letter to my congressman.

I will help my husband find ways to pursue his own list of causes (Especially the ones I agree with).

It is not a huge list of peacemaking steps but it's a start. Any suggestions?

Peace y'all

Molly

How to make peace on a Saturday afternoon

Taking a break from a chore I dislike and wondering 'what can I do today that has the greatest impact?" the followon question is then 'to what end?'. Since this is my peace blog, I suppose I should consider my peacemaking goals. Hmmm. As I write this I'm exercising one of ny wonderful First Amendment rights. I think I'll exercise them more today. Sign some petitions, write Congress, write legislators. And make a nice vegetarian meal.

Any other suggestions for peacemaking on a Saturday afternoon?

Peace, y'all

Molly

Occupying our town --weekend warriors

It's Friday, so the work week is ending. In my community this means the town square occupiers will soon assemble. That's because our occupiers are blessed with jobs--good jobs for many of them. So they rally on the weekends. We have outrage, though, and are glad to be part of a wider movement. Let others laugh. We vote with our feet and our wallets.

Better times will come, but we have to work for them.

Peace, y'all

Molly

Homelessness

Today I'm in the big city and walked by a park where homeless people camp. It makes me uncomfortable. Knowing that bad luck, drugs and mental illness cause people tinkled their homes,jobs and family is bad. Seeing it is worse. That I live in a society that tolerates this is intolerable.

Our nation has a huge disparity between it's richest and poorest citizens. CITIZENS. What rights can homeless people practically exercise?

Something for me to think about.

Peace, y'all

Molly

On occupy Wall Street

I support Occupy Wall Street. Though I am financially secure, I'm only one medical disaster from becoming a have-not. Also I feel outrage that the financiers who wrecked our economy were bailed out--by American taxpayers--while those same taxpayers saw their jobs disappear and their mortgages implode.

Things are a mess. I'm thankful I have a home, a job, and a full tummy. Wish everyone else did too.

Peace y'all

Molly